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A Maineiac

Mainer = A person who stays in Maine for an entire winter.

Maineiac = A person who doesn't have the sense to leave Maine after the 1st winter.

Blonde Tidbits #6

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This one blonde is driving down the street and she sees this other blonde in a canoe in a corn field. The blonde in the car jumps out and yells at the blonde in the canoe. She says "What the heck are you doing? It's blondes like you that make us blondes look stupid. If I knew how to swim, I'd come over there and kick your butt!"

Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their Mercedes with a coat hanger. They tried and tried to get the door open, but they couldn't. The blonde with the coat hanger stopped for a moment to catch her breath, and her friend said anxiously, "Hurry up! It's starting to rain and the top is down."

One day, a blonde and a brunette were out for a ride in the blonde's new car. Suddenly, some jerk pulls in front of them. The blonde then puts her lips on the steering wheel. The brunette fearing for her life, asks, "What are you doing that for?!" The blonde calmly replied, "I'm trying to blow on the horn!"

Two blondes are walking in the woods when one looks down and says, "Look dog poop." The other bends down, smells it and says, "Smells like dog poop." They both stick there fingers in it and say, "Feels like dog poop." They taste it and say, "Tastes like dog poop." Then one says to the other, "Sure glad we didin't step in it."

Q. What do you call a bunch of blondes standing shoulder to shoulder.
A. A wind tunnel

Two blondes were walking down the road and the first blonde says, "Look at that dog with one eye!" The other blonde covers one of her eyes and says, "Where?"

A blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open and her right breast hanging out. A policeman approaches her and says, "Ma'am, are you aware I could cite you for indecent exposure?" She says, "Why, officer?" "Because your breast is exposed." "Oh My God," says the blonde, "I left the baby on the bus!"

Q. What do you call a blonde dyed brunette?
A. Artificial intelligence