Maineiac

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A Maineiac

Mainer = A person who stays in Maine for an entire winter.

Maineiac = A person who doesn't have the sense to leave Maine after the 1st winter.

A Promise Kept

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There was a man who had worked all of his life and had saved all of his money. He was a real miser when it came to his money, always denying himself and his wife any reasonable comfort because he didn't want to part with his precious money.

He loved his money more than anything, so just before he died, he said to his wife, "Now listen, when I die, I want you to take all my money and place it in the casket with me. I wanna take my money to the afterlife."

The wife promised she would do as he said.

One day the old miser died. He was stretched out in the casket, his wife sitting there in black next to her closest friend.

When they finished the ceremony, just before the undertakers got ready to close the casket, the wife said, "Wait just a minute!" She had a shoe box with her which she placed in the casket. Then the undertakers locked the casket down and rolled it away.

Her friend said, "I hope you weren't crazy enough to put all that money in the casket."

She said, "I promised and I'm a good Christian; I can't lie. I promised him that I was going to put that money in the casket with him."

"You mean to tell me you just put every cent of his money in that casket?"

"I sure did," said the wife... "I got it all together, put it into my bank account and I wrote him a check."