Maineiac

Family Safe Jokes

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A Maineiac

Mainer = A person who stays in Maine for an entire winter.

Maineiac = A person who doesn't have the sense to leave Maine after the 1st winter.

Interesting Stuff

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  • The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.
  • Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury.
  • Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better.
  • Coca-Cola was originally green.
  • It is impossible to lick your elbow.
  • Q. What American State has the highest percentage of people who walk to work? A. Alaska
  • The world's youngest parents were 8 and 9 and lived in China in 1910.
  • The youngest pope was 11 years old.
  • The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer
  • Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history: Spades - King David; Hearts - Charlemagne; Clubs - Alexander the Great; Diamonds - Julius Caesar
  • If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both of the horses front legs in the air the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.
  • Q. What occurs more often in December than any other month? A. Conception
  • Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most popular boat name requested? A. Obsession
  • Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil? A. Honey
  • Q. There are more collect calls on this day than any other day of the year? A. Father's Day
  • Q. What trivia fact about Mel Blanc (voice of Bugs Bunny) is the most ironic? A. He was allergic to carrots
  • Q. What is an activity performed by 40% of all people at a party? A. Snooping in your medicine cabinet
  • In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes, the mattress tightened making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase "Goodnight, sleep tight."
  • It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month. We know it today as the "Honeymoon."
  • In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts. So in old England, when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them, "Mind your own pints and quarts and settle down!" It's where we get the phrase "Mind your P's and Q's."
  • Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim or handle of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service. "Wet your whistle" is the phrase inspired by this practice.
  • In Scotland, a new game was invented. It was entitled Gentlemen Only Ladies Forbidden ...and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.

~~~AND FINALLY~~~

  • At least 75% of the people who read this will try to lick their elbow.