Family Safe Jokes

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A Maineiac

Mainer = A person who stays in Maine for an entire winter.

Maineiac = A person who doesn't have the sense to leave Maine after the 1st winter.

Baby Boom Anthems

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Baby boom anthems re-released with new lyrics suitable for an aging audience.

The Beatles--"I Get By with a Little Help From Depends"

Carly Simon--"You're So Varicose Vein"

The Bee Gees--"How Can You Mend a Broken Hip"

Roberta Flack--"The First Time Ever I Forgot Your Face"

Johnny Nash--"I Can't See Clearly Now"

Procol Harem--"A Whiter Shade of Hair"

Herman's Hermits--"Mrs. Brown You've Got a Lovely Walker"

The Rolling Stones--"You Can't Always Pee When You Want"

The Who--"Talkin' 'Bout My Medication"

The Troggs--"Bald Thing"

The Doors-- "Hello, I love you. Won't you tell me my name."