Maineiac

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A Maineiac

Mainer = A person who stays in Maine for an entire winter.

Maineiac = A person who doesn't have the sense to leave Maine after the 1st winter.

Barbies You'll Never See 3

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  • Whoopie Cushion Barbie ...do you really need a description?
  • LAPD Barbie ...comes with two nightsticks, in case one gets broken subduing a suspect. Taser also available.
  • Microsoft Barbie ...Barbie doll with Bill Gates' head
  • Realistic Teenage Barbie ...complete with flat chest, braces and acne; pull her string and hear an outpouring of sassy, bratty phrases
  • Body-Piercing Barbie ...comes with mini-piercing gun and mini-body ornaments
  • Tasmanian Barbie ...spins like a top!
  • Siamese Twins Barbie ...complete with surgical instruments
  • Edible Barbie ...also known as Choc-O-Barbie
  • Hockey Barbie ...comes with hockey stick and missing teeth
  • Lance Ito Ken ...with beard, robe, and entirely too much advertising
  • Marsha Clark Barbie ...with a bad haircut and a bad attitude
  • Diarrhea Barbie ...always on the run; complete with mini-bottle of Pepto!
  • Kleptomaniac Barbie ...doll with suction cup hands
  • Barbie of Borg ...you will buy one. Resistance is futile!
  • Witch Doctor Barbie ...with potions and face paints
  • Elvira Barbie ...with skimpy black gown and long, black hair
  • Werewolf Barbie ...normal doll, except under a full moon
  • Living Dead Barbie ...use your imagination
  • Bigfoot Barbie ...sold mostly in the Northwest
  • Cyclops Barbie ...one eye, right in the middle of her forehead; Cyclops Ken sold separately
  • Flying Hero Barbie ...yes, I know they made this one, but it's at least as ludicrous as anything we came up with!