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A Maineiac

Mainer = A person who stays in Maine for an entire winter.

Maineiac = A person who doesn't have the sense to leave Maine after the 1st winter.

Blonde Tidbits #5

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Q: Why did the blonde write "TGIF" on her shoes?
A: Toes Go In First.

Q: How did the blonde break her legs raking leaves?
A: She fell out of the tree!!

Q: Did you hear about the two blondes that walked into a building?
A: You'd think one of them would have noticed it!

Q: Why is it good to have a blonde for a passenger in a car?
A: So you can park in the handicap zone.

A blonde calls the fire department all excited and says, "Come quick! My barn's on fire, my barn's on fire!" The dispatcher says, "Calm down, now just tell us how to get there." And the blonde says "Oh, don't you have that big red truck anymore?"

A blonde walking along, lost, encountered a deep and wide river. She looked up and down that river and could not see a way across. She looked to the other side and saw another blonde on the opposite river bank and called out to her. "How can I get to the other side of the river?" The other blonde replied, "What for? You are already ON the other side of the river!"

A blonde and a brunette were walking along the beach. The brunette says, "Gosh, look at all the dead seagulls!" The blonde looks up in the sky and says,"Where?"

A blonde was standing in front of a Coke machine. She put in 50 cents and a Coke came out. She set it on top of the Coke machine, put in another 50 cents, pushed the button and another Coke came out. She kept doing this untill a guy standing behind her said, "Excuse me, lady, but can I get my Coke and then you can go back to whatever it is you are doing?" The blonde turns around and says, "Like duh! Not when I am winning!!"