Universal College Professor Translator
You'll be using one of the leading textbooks in the field - I wrote the thing and need the royalties.
If you follow these few simple rules, you'll do fine in this course - Providing, of course, you don't need any sleep or other 'life.'
The gist of what the author is saying is what's most important - I don't understand this at all either.
Various authorities agree that... - My hunch is that...
The answer to your question is beyond the scope of this class - I don't know.
Come see me during my office hours for an answer to your question - I don't know.
In answer to your question, there are several disparate points of view - I really don't know.
Today we are going to discuss a most important topic - Today we are going to discuss my dissertation.
I haven't time to consider all the people who made contributions to this field - I disagree with what roughly half of the people in this field have said.
We can continue this discussion outside of class - I'm tired of this, let's quit (and/or) You're winning the argument, let's quit.
Today we'll let a member of the class lead the discussion; It will be a good educational experience - I stayed out too late last night and didn't have time to prepare a lecture.
Any questions? - Alright, I'm ready to leave now.
The implications of this study are clear - I don't know what all this means either, but there'll be a question about it on the next test.
The test will be 50 questions, multiple choice - The test will be 60 questions multiple guess, plus three short-answer questions (1000 words or more) and no one will score above 65 per cent.
The test scores were generally good - Some of you managed a C+
The test scores were a little below my expectations - Where was the party last night? (and/or) Did any of you idiots even bother to study?
Some of you could have done better - Everyone flunked.
Before we begin today, are there any questions about previous material? - Has anyone bothered to open the book yet?
According to my sources... - According to the guy who taught this thing last year...
It's been very rewarding to teach this class - I hope they find some other sucker to teach this turkey next year!