Men are like parking spaces/the good ones are always taken and the ones left are handicapped.
How do men sort their laundry?
"Filthy" and "Filthy but Wearable"
What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
.If they can send a man to the moon, why can't they send all of 'em?
Why do men push the remote-control buttons harder when the batteries are dead?
How can you tell if your husband is dead?
The attention is the same, but you get the remote.
How many men does it take to change a light bulb?
None, they just sit there in the dark and complain.
What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
Through his chest with a sharp knife.