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A Maineiac

Mainer = A person who stays in Maine for an entire winter.

Maineiac = A person who doesn't have the sense to leave Maine after the 1st winter.

Caught Sleeping At Work

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Try these excuses:

  • They told me at the blood bank that this might happen.
  • This is just a 15 minute power nap like they raved about in that time management course you sent me to.
  • I was working smarter - not harder.
  • Whew! I must have left the top off the whiteout.
  • I wasn’t sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm!
  • This is one of the seven habits of highly effective people!
  • I was testing the keyboard for drool resistance.
  • I’m in the management training program.
  • I’m actually doing a Stress Level Elimination Exercise Plan (SLEEP) I learned at the last mandatory seminar you made me attend.
  • This is in exchange for the six hours last night when I dreamed about work!
  • I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work related stress. Do you discriminate against people who practice Yoga?
  • Damn! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem.
  • The coffee machine is broken.... Someone must have put decaf in the wrong pot.
  • Boy, that cold medicine I took last night just won’t wear off.
  • Ah, the unique and unpredictable circadian rhythms of the workaholic!
  • I wasn’t sleeping. I was trying to pick up my contact lens without my hands.
  • The mail courier flipped out and pulled a gun so I was playing dead to avoid getting shot.
  • Geez, I thought you (the boss) were gone for the day.