Maineiac

Ever want to call someone stupid, but want to do it in a way that is politically correct? Here are some great suggestions sent in by various people:

• A few cards short of a full deck
• A few clowns short of a circus
• A few fries short of a Happy Meal
• An experiment in artificial stupidity

• A few beers short of a six pack
• Dumber than a box of hair
• A few peas short of a casserole
• Doesn't have all his Cornflakes in one box
• The wheel's spinning but the hamster's dead
• One Fruit Loop shy of a full bowl
• One taco short of a combination plate
• A few feathers short of a whole duck
• All foam, no beer
• The cheese slid off his cracker
• Body by Fisher, brains by Mattel
• Has an IQ of 2, but it takes 3 to grunt
• Warning: Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear
• Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel
• He fell out of the Stupid Tree and hit every branch on the way down
• An intellect rivaled only by garden tools
• As smart as bait
• Chimney's clogged
• Doesn't have all his dogs on one leash
• Doesn't know much, but leads the league in nostril hair
• Elevator doesn't go all the way to the top floor
• Forgot to pay his brain bill
• Her sewing machine's out of thread
• His antenna doesn't pick up all the channels
• His belt doesn't go through all the loops
• If he had another brain, it would be lonely
• Missing a few buttons on his remote control
• No grain in the silo
• Proof that evolution can go in reverse
• Receiver is off the hook
• Several nuts short of a full pouch
• Sky light leaks a little
• Slinky's kinked
• Surfing in Nebraska
• Too much yardage between the goal posts