Maineiac

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A Maineiac

Mainer = A person who stays in Maine for an entire winter.

Maineiac = A person who doesn't have the sense to leave Maine after the 1st winter.

Visiting California

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A man from the East Coast is visiting California for the first time, and is conversing with a California native.

He says, "I'll be visiting La Jolla (lah-JOLL-a) next week," whereupon the Californian replies, "Oh, you mean, 'La-*HOY-a'?"

"Oh. Yeah, I guess so." Then he adds, "But right now I'm staying in El Cajon (el-ca-JOHN)," and again the Californian corrects him, "You mean, El Ca 'HONE'?"

"Oh. Yeah, right." Then the Californian asks, "So when will you be returning home?"

The East Coast guy thinks about it for a minute and then answers, "Oh, I don't know, I guess sometime in 'HUNE' or 'HULY'."