Reasons Dogs Are Better Than Women

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Dogs don't cry.

  • Dogs love it when your friends come over.
  • A dog's time in the bathroom is confined to a quick drink.
  • Dogs don't care if you play with other dogs.
  • Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.
  • Dogs are excited by rough play.
  • Dogs love red meat.
  • Dogs can appreciate excessive body hair.
  • If a dog is gorgeous, other dogs don't hate it.
  • A dog's disposition stays the same all month long.
  • A dog's parents never visit.
  • Dogs understand that instincts are better than asking for directions.
  • Dogs know that all animals smaller than dogs were made to be hunted.
  • When a dog gets old and starts to snap at you incessantly, you can shoot it.
  • Dogs don't hate their bodies.
  • No dog ever put on 100 pounds after reaching adulthood.
  • Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.
  • Dogs don't want to know about every other dog you ever had.
  • Dogs like to do their snooping outside as opposed to in your wallet, desk, and the back of your sock drawer.
  • Dogs would rather have you buy them a hamburger dinner than lobster.
  • You never have to wait for a dog. They're ready to go 24 hours a day.
  • Dogs have no use for flowers, cards, or jewelry.
  • Dogs don't borrow your shirts.
  • Dogs never want foot-rubs.
  • Dogs enjoy heavy petting in public.