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A Maineiac
Mainer = A person who stays in Maine for an entire winter.
Maineiac = A person who doesn't have the sense to leave Maine after the 1st winter.
PERSONAL ADS DECODER
MEN'S ADS
40-ish: 52 and looking for 25-yr-old
Athletic: Watches a lot of NASCAR
Good looking: Arrogant
Very good looking: Dumb as a board
Honest: Pathological liar
Likes to cuddle: Insecure mama's boy
Mature: Older than your father
Physically fit: Does a lot of 12-ounce curls
Thoughtful: Says "Excuse me" when he farts
WOMEN'S ADS
40-ish: 49
Adventurer: Has dated all your friends
Athletic: No chest
Average looking: Has a face like a basset hound
Beautiful: Pathological liar
Emotionally Secure: Medicated
Fun: Annoying
Gentle: Comatose
Outgoing: Loud and Embarrassing
Passionate: Sloppy drunk
