Family Safe Jokes

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A Maineiac

Mainer = A person who stays in Maine for an entire winter.

Maineiac = A person who doesn't have the sense to leave Maine after the 1st winter.

Redneck Computer Terms

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  • BACKUP - What you do when you run over a coon in the woods
  • BAR CODE - Them's the fight'n rules down at the local tavern
  • BUG - The reason you give for calling out sick
  • CACHE - Needed when you run out of food stamps
  • CHIP - Pasture muffins that you try not to step in
  • TERMINAL - Time to call the undertaker
  • CRASH - When you go to Juniors party univited
  • DIGITAL - The art of counting on you fingers
  • DISKETTE - Female Disco dancer
  • FAX - What you lie about to the IRS
  • HACKER - Uncle Leroy after 32 years of smoking
  • HARDCOPY - Picture looked at when selecting tattoos
  • INTERNET - Where cafeteria workers put ther hair
  • KEYBOARD - Where you hang the keys to the John Deere
  • MAC - Big Bubba's favorite fast food
  • MEGAHERTZ - How your head feels after 17 beers
  • MODEM - What ya did when the grass and weeds got too tall
  • MOUSE PAD - Where Mickey and Minnie lives
  • ONLINE - Where to stay when taking the sobriety test
  • ROM - Where the pope lives