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A Maineiac
Mainer = A person who stays in Maine for an entire winter.
Maineiac = A person who doesn't have the sense to leave Maine after the 1st winter.
Be Careful What You Wish For
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A married couple, each 60 years old, was celebrating their 40 year wedding anniversary, and during the celebration, a fairy godmother appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple all those years, she would give them one wish each.
Being the faithful, loving spouse for all these years, naturally the wife wanted for her and her husband to have a romantic vacation together, so she wished for them to travel around the world.
The fairy godmother waved her wand and -boom!- the wife had the tickets in her hand.
Next, it was the husband's turn and the fairy godmother assured him he could have any wish he wanted, all he needed to do was ask for his heart's desire.
He paused for a moment, then said, "Well, honestly, I'd like to have a woman 30 years younger than me."
The fairy godmother picked up her wand and -boom!- he was 90!!
Don't you just love fairy godmothers!
