Maineiac

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A Maineiac

Mainer = A person who stays in Maine for an entire winter.

Maineiac = A person who doesn't have the sense to leave Maine after the 1st winter.

Seat Upgrade

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Please do not be offended by this story. READ IT ALL THE WAY THROUGH...it's got a really good ending!!!

On a British Airways flight from Johannesburg, a middle-aged, well-off white South African lady has found herself sitting next to a black man.

She called the cabin crew attendant over to complain about her seating.

"What seems to be the problem, Madam?" asked the attendant.

"Can't you see?" she said, "You've sat me next to a kafir. I can't possibly sit next to this disgusting human. Find me another seat!"

"Please calm down, Madam," the stewardess replied. "The flight is very full today, but I'll tell you what I'll do. I'll go and check to see if we have any seats available in club or first class."

The woman cocks a snooty look at the outraged black man beside her, not to mention many of the surrounding passengers.

A few minutes later the stewardess returns with the good news, which she delivers to the lady, who cannot help but look at the people around her with a smug and self-satisfied grin. "Madam, unfortunately, as I suspected, economy is full. I've spoken to the cabin services director, and club is also full. However, we do have one seat in first class."

Before the lady has a chance to answer, the stewardess continues: "It is most extraordinary to make this kind of upgrade, however, and I have had to get special permission from the captain. But, given the circumstances, the captain felt that it was outrageous that someone should be forced to sit next such an obnoxious person."

With that, she turned to the black man and said, "So if you'd like to get your things, Sir, I have your new seat ready for you..."

At which point, the surrounding passengers stood and gave a standing ovation while the man walked to the front of the plane.

I TOLD you it was a good one!!!