Maineiac

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A Maineiac

Mainer = A person who stays in Maine for an entire winter.

Maineiac = A person who doesn't have the sense to leave Maine after the 1st winter.

Survivor Wisconsin

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Due to the popularity of the Survivor shows, Wisconsin is planning to do its own, entitled "Survivor-Wisconsin Style."

The contestants will start in Milwaukee, travel up to Sheboygan and on to Manitiwoc and Green Bay. Then they will head over to Wausau and up to Rhinelander and Minoqua. From there they will proceed up to Ashland and Superior. Then back down through Rice Lake, Eau Claire and all the way down to Madison and back over to Milwaukee.

Each will be driving a pink Volvo with Illinois license plates and a large bumper sticker that reads "I'm a vegetarian. Bratwurst clogs your arteries. The Green Bay Packers suck. Go Bears! Cheese is high in cholesterol. Hillary in 2004. Deer Hunting is murder and I'm here to confiscate your guns!"

The first one that makes it back to Milwaukee alive wins. Good luck to all contestants.